When to use it
Use it when a team faces a tempting shortcut, unclear permission, disputed credit or a decision that affects people outside the group.
How to use it
Name the exact choice. Separate several arguments that have become tangled together. A decision about using a recording is different from deciding how attractive a presentation should be.
List the people affected, including anyone whose words, image, time or work is involved but who is not present. Record what is known about their wishes and what permission still needs checking.
Ask five practical questions: Is this fair? Is it honest? Good for whom? Does it match the shared purpose? What may happen afterward? Keep benefits and costs visible rather than pretending the favored option has neither.
Invite each participant’s view and wait long enough for an answer. Ask about the underlying concern. Do not replace a missing person’s stated boundary with what the group hopes that person probably meant.
Choose an option that fits the commitments and permission actually available. When safety, rules or another person’s consent are unclear, consult the appropriate adult or responsible person before proceeding.
Record the reason and review the result later. A principled choice can still involve disappointment, extra work or losing an opportunity. Evaluate both the practical result and whether the group honored its commitments.
A worked example
A practical illustration of the method.
A student’s relative allows a recorded interview to be used for private notes but declines public audio playback. A team thinks ten seconds would improve its competition entry. The compass includes the relative even though he is absent. The team respects the limit and uses the approved written account. It does not claim that integrity guarantees a prize or that removing the name would change the permission.
Use it thoughtfully
A majority vote does not override an absent person’s clear permission boundary.
Do not hide a cost to make an ethical decision seem effortless or guaranteed to succeed.
Use the questions to examine an option, not to label the person who suggested it as bad.
From the book
Questions that help a group make fair, honest decisions while considering everyone affected, including people outside the team.
Living a Higher Purpose · Chapter 9: The Conflicting Team, manuscript line 735
Excerpt from the author’s current manuscript; page numbers vary by edition. The practical instructions on this page are companion guidance, not additional quoted text.
Related chapters in this book: 9, 13, 14, 16, 39, 42.
An educational reflection or planning practice presented by the book. Its values guide choices; this page does not claim the method is a validated assessment, treatment, or guarantee of results.
Put it into practice
Your next step
Use these prompts for a real situation or a made-up example. Younger readers can work with a trusted adult.
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